WARNING: This is a private website. The humor expressed here may not be your type, and if it isn't, get off our website. If you find no humor on this page, please call 911, as you have no heartbeat and need to get to a hospital quickly.

Why this warning? Because I was told that this web page was offensive to "some people" by the CCG. We don't think it is. So if you have no sense of humor or just wish to disturb shit, go somewhere else. 

 

 

Serving time with the 'guard . . .

The Canadian Coast Guard experience.

 

Working on a ship is tough, hard, gruelling work.With dangerous situations galore, poor food, and deplorable conditions, a ship is where a boy becomes a man.

Fortunately I work for the Coast Guard where all that stuff does'nt apply. Phewwwww !

Here are some pics taken over the last year serving on the ship Narwhal and Gordon Reid.

 

 

It all starts with the mean deck boss ! That evil Don.

. . . we pass the time by getting stoned

then we are force to defecate outdoors . . . the shame

before the sun comes up,

where under constant threat from the living dead.

as sailors, we must take drastic measures to go ashore

then, hourly, we have to report to the ROC, Regional Operations Center

- and we though we had it bad . . .

. . . we have to fight with all sorts for our rations . . .

. . . learning the official Coast Guard salute takes time . . .

. . . our work is under constant scrutiny. . .

helicopter operation make for a tough day

proper hair care is of paramount importance

the deck hands are always re-enacting the Titanic's "king of the world" scene . . .

. . . headquarters forces us to have Mandatory Fun activities, led by the morale officer.

. . . when the ship breaks down, we must resort to pull it in to the base - by hand !

. . . then we are subjected to constant harrasment from bachelorette parties..

. . . We are force to eat vast amounts of steak, rare !

looking for illegal immigrants makes everybody tired . . .

. . . to do laundry, we go for a sail.

since we have no weapons, we must engage in staring contest

On the wild, rugged coast of BC, the sasquatch often pays us a visit

The engineer is occasionally let out of the engine room for his ration

 
Drastic measures are often taken to silence the immense level of BS from the deckhands

Dr. Evils third cousin uses his time making new earings. On the other hand, Dr Evil's  second cousin takes his job very seriously

As you can see life in the Canadian Coast Guard is tough.

Please parents, prevent your child being suckered into this life.

Oct. / Dec. 1999-2000

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© Martin Leduc  All rights reserved. Revised: November 14, 2002.